Health and WelfareAugust 26, IST 21:2602 PM
It’s a strange thing. It steals silently up behind you, and before you even know it’s there, you’re enveloped in its dark and heavy cloak.
Strange, too, that you can grieve for something you only knew you had when you realized that it was lost; for something that you hadn’t tried to possess; for something that you know wasn’t meant to be.
And so it isn’t.
And I’m shocked to find that it still breaks my heart.
Grief is a tough one. It doesn’t go away in a day, a week, a year, ten years; it just transforms from unbearable to bearable. Stella is seized with grief (for her younger sister and the uncle who passed on at the same time as your father) at the most unexpected times, in the middle of otherwise cheerful events, etc. For me, with loved ones and not-so-loved ones, after a while, the grief has less to do with the love than with the sense that things were left unresolved. All I can say to you, Lilith, is that grief can coexist with daily life and ongoing positive experiences. Hang in there; I’m thinking of you.
Comment by Steve Bates — August 27, IST @ 15:2729 PM
Steve, an inexcusably belated “thank you.”
I hope Stella’s well; after my first sister died 14 years ago, I went through something similar. You’re going along, enjoying your day, and wham! It hits you like a ton of bricks. I think now my reaction tends to be more like yours: So much unresolved. Ironically, though, what’s been hardest is a more deeply personal loss that occurred in the weeks after Dad’s death - a loss of something I literally didn’t know I had until it was gone.
But time is having its effect, a bit. And thank you for always knowing exactly what to say.
Comment by Administrator — January 10, GMT @ 08:1002 AM